As a 6th grader having to read my "funny" or "creative" story in front of the class as everyone did on a Friday was just a roller coaster. I would go up in front of the classroom and before I started talking, my hands got sweaty. Before I read the sentence, my eyes would water. I would stand there. Shaking. It was a feeling that I knew I was confident and could go through my whole story, but I just could not.
Now think of this: Your having a class party and the teacher asks for food options. You may not share your idea/ opinion. But if you did not get to vote, you made a choice of having others vote for you and make your decision ( at least the average - majority- select for you).
Being a shy young girl, I did not participate much. In other words, many choices were made for me or I followed the "crowd". It also made me so insecure about myself. I wanted to fit in. However, to do so, I always had everyone else go first before I did.
Now, gaining my confidence back in myself, I like starting first or volunteering first: to get over with whatever it is or simply because I feel excited and prepared and not as nervous as before. When ever I saw something wrong, I never spoke up and if I did, I was afraid. Now, I feel okay to make conversations or argue politely with anyone. I am not afraid. I am not afraid to ask questions. I am not afraid to simply be me.
Now think of this: Your having a class party and the teacher asks for food options. You may not share your idea/ opinion. But if you did not get to vote, you made a choice of having others vote for you and make your decision ( at least the average - majority- select for you).
Being a shy young girl, I did not participate much. In other words, many choices were made for me or I followed the "crowd". It also made me so insecure about myself. I wanted to fit in. However, to do so, I always had everyone else go first before I did.
Now, gaining my confidence back in myself, I like starting first or volunteering first: to get over with whatever it is or simply because I feel excited and prepared and not as nervous as before. When ever I saw something wrong, I never spoke up and if I did, I was afraid. Now, I feel okay to make conversations or argue politely with anyone. I am not afraid. I am not afraid to ask questions. I am not afraid to simply be me.
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